So he seppuku’d himself on a door bolt, you say?

Following the funeral riot

The Washington Post reported

that an unnamed prisoner in police custody

claimed that Freddie Gray’s nearly severed spine

battered face & crushed larynx

were self-inflicted injuries,

presumably so he could frame them for police brutality

by not being physically capable of accusing anyone of anything

because he crushed his own larynx.

In other news,

The Baltimore Elementary Gazette reported

“Riot Police Injure Selves By Raucously Head-Butting Inexplicable Soaring Rocks.”


37 thoughts on “So he seppuku’d himself on a door bolt, you say?

  1. So much abuse of late by the authorities in charge of protecting the public. And when bad cops do so, they give the officers and their departments who do their job, risking their lives day in and day out, and with integrity, honesty, and honor a really bad name. The phrase; police state takes on an even more despicable reference on account of these incidents. Although none of us are saints, and perhaps Mr. Gray wasn’t one either, but I seriously doubt he went to all the trouble to resist arrest, and suffer through self-abuse, just to frame some crooked cops! Yes. they do have those kind of cops folks. What a mess! All because of a few bad apples. :O(

  2. I love how my fellow white folk love to make comments like, “so you’re oppressed by police so burn down the city!”

    Us white folk choose much more important reasons to riot . . . Like losing a sporting event . . . Or winning one.

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